Everything this week was all messed up. I had a lot of things that needed to be done at work, and had to weigh that against spreading the germs of this nasty bug that I am STILL sick with. My co-workers had serious medical things going on in their families or were sick too. I had to cancel my physical therapy and doctor’s appointments for my hand. There was lots of stuff going on in the background that I wasn’t even aware of, thanks to kind friends who didn’t want to upset me. I am somewhat up to speed but I have decided to spend the day in bed, napping when I can. The goal is to have this bug whipped and behind me by Monday morning.
I am sad that I have two friends right now who are seriously ill. The downside of this time of life is that you increasingly experience your friends and family’s problems and losses. It is a hard adjustment, and it is one, like aging, that is unavoidable and keeps going no matter what you do. My mother struggles with it a lot, since she is now one of the eldest women in her community. So the trick is how you react to it. You can’t control it, you can’t change it, but you can control your reaction to it. You have to maintain a reserve of strength.
I’m only a week and a half away from my Artful Journey, during which I will turn 50 years old! I am so excited to be entering my 50s. Some of the most together people I have ever met were in their 50s when I met them, and my admiration for them fuels my enthusiasm for aging well.
I have a commission for a book this weekend but I am going to wait until I am not so germy to make it.
We watched the first three episodes of Breaking Bad through Netflix this week. What a strange show. It is excellent and unnerving on many levels. Like the Sopranos, there are parts that are funny and parts that are sad and gory and awful and they are all knit together like the complicated web that life is.
I’ve also been watching the first three seasons of The Practice, which I missed when it was on. It appears that I am about to come to the end because I haven’t been able to find Seasons 4-8.
I’m finishing up I Thought It Was Just Me by Brene Brown. This is not a quick read – it is a thoughtful book about the differences between shame and guilt, and how blame relates to them, and how to build shame resilience. I recommend it highly to everyone.
I am starting The River King by Alice Hoffman and eating ice cream out of my coffee cup. It feels so good on my ravaged throat. I can barely talk, but I do feel a whole lot better.